Caregiving: a long-term commitment that comes with watching someone you love age with a disease known to change the person you once knew, all while you juggle various roles and responsibilities to make sure they are still being provided for.
Some days, it feels like the world’s weight is falling on your shoulders.
We know your plate is full, and that is why we’re here – to ease some of the burdens for you and provide you with the tools, resources, and support needed to ensure you and your loved one live a life full of meaning and purpose.
You need not walk this journey alone, and even during some of the hardest trials, there is still joy to be found in caregiving.
Let us help you find it.
Dear Caregiver,
Caring for a loved one living with dementia is a profound and often challenging journey. The moments of joy are precious, but the emotional weight can sometimes feel overwhelming. If you’re a caregiver, you may find yourself caught in an emotional tug-of-war — one moment feeling immense love and devotion, the next feeling trapped and isolated.
Between cherishing moments of connection and grieving changes you never wanted, it’s completely normal to feel as though you are running on empty, emotionally and physically. Truth be told, this is a struggle that many caregivers know intimately.
The good news is that as difficult as it may seem at times, there are ways to move forward, even when the path ahead feels unclear. Navigating this journey without feeling trapped or drowning means learning to offer yourself compassion and lending grace to the loved one you care for.
Understanding the Feeling of Being Trapped
It’s important to acknowledge that caregiving, especially for someone with dementia, can often feel like you’re trapped in a cycle of responsibilities without the space or time for your own needs. You might find yourself constantly juggling multiple roles—emotional supporter, physical caretaker, decision-maker, and more—while also managing your own life outside of caregiving. It’s a lot to bear, and at times, it can feel suffocating.
The repeated nature of caregiving tasks—like assisting with daily activities, managing medical appointments, and comforting a loved one through confusion or frustration—can feel like a never-ending loop. You might even feel disconnected from your former self or as if the needs of another have swallowed up your own identity. This sense of being trapped is valid and real, bearing a unique form of grief, and it’s something that many caregivers experience, though it’s often hard to talk about.
But remember: Your feelings are not a reflection of your love or devotion. They are a human response to the immense challenges you are facing. It’s okay to feel exhausted, frustrated, or even overwhelmed. Many caregivers who have walked in your shoes would even argue that experiencing all of these feelings is just a testament to how great of a caregiver you are – because if you were not feeling anything about your journey, then something is likely missing.
Moving Forward with Compassion and Grace
No matter what your brain might tell you, it’s crucial to acknowledge that YES, your well-being matters too. And, while the road may be difficult, there are steps you can take to nurture your own well-being and approach caregiving with renewed compassion and grace.
Acknowledge Your Emotions: First and foremost, allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling. Caregivers often carry guilt or shame about feeling overwhelmed, but it’s okay to feel all the emotions—sadness, frustration, or even anger.
Ignoring how you feel is like nothing more than sweeping things under the rug, and eventually, you’ll start tripping over everything you’ve pushed aside. Your emotions are a natural response to the challenges you face, and speaking to a friend, joining a caregiver support group, or even journaling your thoughts can help you process and release some of the emotional burden.
Set Boundaries and Ask for Help: There is no “clocking out” for caregivers, which could be one of the biggest reasons many feel trapped by their roles. So, it is essential to know that, while caregiving can feel all-consuming, you’re allowed to set boundaries that protect you and your mental and physical health.
Please know it’s okay to say no when you need to take time for yourself. Ask for help when you need it—whether from family members, friends, or professional caregivers. Reaching out for support is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same compassion you offer your loved one. Caregiving is a journey that will always be filled with ups and downs. You will have good days and difficult days. Be gentle with yourself on the tough days. Forgive yourself for moments when things don’t go as planned, and remember that you are doing the best you can in an incredibly challenging situation.
And remember, when you start to feel as though you are drowning beneath the weight of it all, it’s okay to take breaks—these moments will recharge your spirit and help you be present with your loved one.
Grace: Your Secret Power for Caregiving
Lending grace in caregiving is not about being perfect or having all the answers. It’s about showing up with kindness—toward your loved one and yourself. It’s about recognizing that some days will be harder than others, and that’s okay. It’s about accepting that you can’t always control the course of dementia, but you can control how you navigate the journey with love, compassion, and understanding.
Remember, caregiving is a marathon, not a sprint. There will be hard days, but there will also be many moments of love and tenderness. Allow yourself to experience both the joy and the sorrow of this path, knowing that you are doing important, meaningful work. Take it one day at a time, rest and recharge when needed, and know that your well-being is just as important as the care you provide.
Signed,
A Fellow Caregiver
We're Here For You
The impacts of Alzheimer’s, dementia, and other age-related issues affect the entire family. Oakwood Creative Care provides services, education, and support to help you ensure you never have to navigate through this journey alone.
